The fight of a generation
Wednesday, November 4, 2009 at 9:12AM | 21 Comments Matt Cheuvront at Life Without Pants wrote a poignant post today about Maine's rejection of an equal marriage law. His insights are personal, honest, and straightforward. And I agree with him on each point. This is the preeminent civil rights issue of our generation.
When I moved to the "big city" of Nashville as a 7th grader, my mom asked how my first day of school was. I told her, "Mom - there were a lot of handicapped and black people there."
I didn't say this as a prejudiced or racist declaration. It was in fact quite the opposite as I found myself quickly befriending each group. It was simply that I'd never seen such an equal balance of race and ability in a school setting before.
And therein lies my hope that the gay marriage struggle will not end with Maine's voters. Hopes for an equal and diverse society are ultimately not in the hands of Boomers or The Silent Generation. They're in the hands of my generation, Generation Y.
This is true for two reasons:
- We grew up with integrated sports teams and classrooms. We elected an African-American president and have seen women lead with skill. Personal preferences and prejudices still exist and the struggle for equal rights for all is far from over. But, our generation has seen what a better tomorrow can be like, and we'll work for it.
- As Matt writes, America is still a great place. In fact, even when it resembles more oppressive countries, it's easier than those same countries to change that resemblance. We can form groups and coalitions and work for the change we wish to see.
I hope my generation will be the one to resolve every civil rights issue. If we can't do it today, certainly we can by the time my daughter is my age. I fight for things now so that she will be able to marry whoever she wants. I fight so that my friends can access the same rights that I have as a married man. While I hate to think we'll need to wait that long, I have a great hope that my daughter will be able to vote yes - along with a majority - when she has the chance to extend equal legal benefits to homosexual couples.
Unless she becomes religious. Remember - religion can provide a very racist and sexist crutch to lean on.
Reader Comments (21)
True, religion can indeed provide a very racist and sexist crutch. A relationship with Jesus Christ, however, drives one to a Biblical worldview and Biblical principles by which we should live. This is the central issue, and one that is debated round and round in circles ad naseum. Here's to those in Generation Y, our generation, who will continue to stand on Biblical principles, regardless of what the culture around us deems appropriate.
The ad naseum debate is the issue, however. Your "Biblical principles" can be very different from mine. Either of ours could justify hate, exclusion and inequality, and that's a problem. Those who use the Bible, God, Jesus, or religion to uphold their unequal treatment of gays have a hard time reasoning they would have done differently years ago with non-whites.
That is a good point. The ad naseum debate is the issue.Yet, I have a hard time with your last sentence in which you said,
The simple fact that one generation's prejudice and bigotry found it's root in a misguided view of Scripture does not necessarily mean that same thing is true of the present generation. It is not difficult at all for me to see that I, and others like me, would have defended equal rights for blacks or any other racial group in generations past. The Scriptures are very clear that we are all created equal as individuals. Yet, the Scriptures are also very clear that various behaviors of those same individuals are not appropriate. We can debate whether or not this issue should be as "hot" as it is among evangelical Christians. That is an issue that is debatable (not for me, personally, but for many others it is). I appreciate your thoughts. We just disagree.
Well said, JT. I know that a large portion of the population agrees with you, but sometimes its hard for some to muster the courage to speak up on the contrary to such a loud and hostile opposition. Thank you for your thoughts.
Sure - it is incorrect of me to assume everyone who uses Scripture to deny gays the right to marry would have also denied equal rights to non-Whites. However, many people used Scripture to do just that. The problem with using the Bible to justify anything is that ultimately, it's an issue of faith (as it should be). At the root of it all, you believe that your understanding of scripture is the right one, whether you're fighting for equality or against it.
I do appreciate you weighing in here. Obviously we disagree on the reading of Scripture which is okay. Thankfully we live in a country where that's allowed.
So let the churches have "marriage". Make it like baptism or communion - meaningless outside the church's walls and members' hearts. Make it officially and completely without standing in a governmental sense.
Then come up with a new word and make that the official term for a state-recognized union. If you want to file joint taxes, if you want to get joint health care or bank accounts, that's the one that counts.
If you try to open a bank account and say, "We're married" it'd be like saying, "We're baptized." Or, "We're vegetarians." Or, "I wear a size 8 tennis shoe." Good for you!
But if you've got the documentation from the state, then you're official. Officially joined.
Ministers (etc.) shouldn't have automatic rights to performs these unions. They have to apply for the license just like everybody else. Just because you call yourself "ordained" shouldn't make you magical in the state's eyes. Get in line - no fronts. Then do your ceremony and religiously marry and governmentally join at the same time.
It just amazes me that you're allowed to fall in love with whomever you want, but if you want to get the official benefits in most US states, it better have happened with someone of the opposite sex. That's BS.
So religion, keep marriage and make it as exclusive and ridiculous as you want inside your walls. The rest of us can come up with a new word to define reality.
From a single, straight guy: welcome to the 90s.
People can either stand in the way and try to prevent the gay community from being treated equally or get out of the way and let change happen as it should.
If people stand in the way, the gay community and their supporters obviously suffer and the anti-gay marriage population suffers from having to fight to prevent something that is going to happen eventually anyway. If people get out of the way and let change happen, millions of people get to live a better and more equal life and that's it. No more suffering for anyone.
And since the lives of straight people won't be affected at all by such a change, then why would anyone want to stand in the way of other people's happiness? Everyone on this earth just wants to live happily and be treated fairly, so are people that selfish that they want to deny this to a segment of society whose choices don't even affect their own lives?
Of course, people say "I'm not selfish, it has to do with religion'' but are people still using religion to shape their views? Seriously?
Why not go out into the world instead and learn about life through first-hand experience and then create your own views and perspectives and rules to live by...just an idea.
Excellent post by the way! Inequality drives me mad!
Earl, your logic is infantile.
Thank your for taking the time to speak about your perspective on this issue. I know that after 21 years together, it's high time Joan made an honest woman out of me.
Massachusetts - - May 17, 2004
Connecticut - - Nov 12, 2008
Iowa -- Apr 24, 2009
Vermont -- Sep 1, 2009
New Hampshire - Jan 1, 2010
check out this website for a flag you can waive:
http://www.makeitequal.org
Sam,
This is great. I'm with you on this... it will change because we will eventually change it. Perhaps first being rejected will unite us all so that we can overcome it. Thank you for writing about this.
Ben
Gen Y is a tolerant generation. Did you know 9 out of 10 Gen Y Americans have had an inter-racial relationship? Most of us have no problem with gay people - we grew up with it, just like we grew up with every different race in the classroom. I have no doubt our generation will right this wrong. It's not a great solution, but whenever this stuff makes me mad I think, "my generation doesn't feel that way." It helps me remove myself from the situation.
Sam, this post interests me, as I am currently in an education grad program at OSU talking about all the forms of oppression that exist in our society (racism, sexism, classism, heterosexism, able-ism, etc.) and how teachers and schools can combat them rather than perpetuate them. You said: "I hope my generation will be the one to resolve every civil rights issue. If we can't do it today, certainly we can by the time my daughter is my age." I hate to be a pessimist, but this statement seems a little naive to me.
While I hope and believe that we can make progress on some of our current Civil Rights issues, I also believe that oppression in various forms will always exist on Earth. People have been oppressing others and being oppressed throughout human history-- though it may take different forms in different times and places. And humans have never been able to solve this fundamental human problem. So I guess I am saying that even if we "solve" the Civil Rights issues, people will continue oppressing people-- just in different ways. That is why I am so thankful that the Bible teaches that God is against oppression, and that He will ultimately redeem the world.
Do you think that Gen Y, or humans in general, can someday completely eradicate all forms of oppression?
Susanna:
Naive? Maybe. Hopeful? Definitely.
I do believe humans can eradicate oppression. That's why I do what I do. If I didn't think it was possible, it would be very easy for me to not worry with it (large-scale change in any form). That's why I don't buy lottery tickets - I don't think I'll win. And that's why I do work to make the world a better place - I think it's possible.
I truly believe homosexual rights (not just the right to marry, but the right to be loved by their fellow man/woman as an equal and whole human being) will be the March on Birmingham and Seneca Falls Rights Convention for our generation. I am readying myself for the battle, preparing to fight fear and ignorance with blind love and compassion. To teach and embrace rather than match jabs for jabs and eyes for eyes.
From out the rubble of a very close vote I have unending faith that Maine will learn and come back stronger than we ever were before. :)
Sam- I have to gravely dissagree with your analysis. The most preeminent civil rights issue of our day is BY FAR the issue of preserving the right to live for the unborn. This will be the issue that your daughter and ,maybe one day mine, will look back on and wonder how we allowed millions of unborn babies to be murdered because they would 'cost too much' or 'take too much time to take care of' or whatever lame reason that is given to justify mass murder day in and day out in our 'blessed' nation. I hope that Gen Y and Gen X will see this issue for what it is and publically outcry against it with conviction in the days ahead.......and maybe even adopt one of these babies who is spared along the way....
Eddie - Thanks for sharing. Certainly, you know that abortion is never as simple as a baby costing too much. I am glad that you've found a civil rights issue worth fighting for. And I agree - I'd love to see more adoptions happen.
Hi Sam. I hope that my comments did not make it sound like I am without hope. Though I have no faith in humans and their ability to eradicate oppression, I have great faith in God-- not only in His power to redeem the world, but also in His desire to redeem the world. And I think that he involves humans in this work of redemption.... which is why I continue to work.
I just can't imagine what it would be like to put faith in humanity rather than in God. Not only are humanity's problems too big for us to solve, but we are also implicated in creating them! Coming to this realization leaves me no other choice but to ask the Lord to have mercy on me, a sinner!
Susanna - I see where you're coming from. I definitely believe that God uses humans to redeem the world and create resurrection moments every day. For me, the "God will make it better in the end" argument often creates laziness more than it motivates humans to get involved in God's work. I know that's not your stance - I've just seen it play out that way too many times to use it as theological reasoning.
Hi Sam... I just read a blog that articulates what I was trying to say... http://www.rachelheldevans.com/changing-world#shareAnchor
What do you think?
Again, I see the theory behind her point of:
But on good days, I give up on trying to change the world, and get back to living like Jesus—in this moment, in every moment.
I've just seen it rarely play out like that. That's why I'm hesitant to wholeheartedly agree. And honestly, Susanna, I do have a lot of hope in people. A lot.
Besides, a lot of people are tired of waiting on God (like the oppressed). God tends to take too long. It's time to get to work.
Eddie,
Thank you for articulating an issue that I, and finally the majority of our country, feel so strongly about. So many times, it truly is a matter of convenience that abortions occur in such abundance. When those who claim to be so passionate about social justice speak about "the least of these among us", they conveniently forget about those who are truly least, the defenseless children who are slaughtered by the millions in the name of "choice". Too bad that child doesn't get a choice. That is, indeed, the preeminent civil rights issue of our generation. I pray my generation (I'm 31) can right this injustice and reverse the infanticide that is inexplicably accepted in our nation.