Brain Snacks 035: For to with

We do things for others, to others, and with others.

When we do something for someone, we’re usually helping them out, providing something that they can’t attain alone.

When we do something to someone, we’re impacting them in some way. They are the direct benefactor or victim of our action.

When we do something with someone, we’re working alongside them. We’re equals in a task or goal.

The problem lies in making sure we’re clear about which is happening. Strife, confusion, and discord happen when, for example, we think we’re doing something for someone, but we’re actually doing something to them.

Before your next course of action, ask yourself, “Am I doing this for them, to them, or with them?” That will clarify not just your purpose, but also your path.

And better yet, ask them.